The carbon fiber ones are hilarious. The mesh is almost believable, but explain to me the ones that are filled with carbon fiber. What are they "venting".
Well,
it's quite simple really.
They are allowing the carbon fiber inlays to breathe. Scientifically, the 3m adhesion that is used to attach the vents to the sides of the vehicle have deposits of aeon flux dispositional otteraces that need to expand and contract to bend the metal or plastic of the car fender to fit the shape of the carbon fiber inlay. The weave of the fake carbon fiber itself collects moisture from the air and uses a catalysts to form microscopic upside down wings (or spoilers) that help in the down-force of the rear-most portion of the fender causing drag and a performance increase of about .0002% of the proportion of space the carbon takes up divided by the amount of surface area left on the fender that is uncovered.
One may argue that if the vents are not located in EXACTLY the same spots on both sides of the car, the entire weight and body roll of the car will become unbalanced, but research has proven that the position can vary by .002Cm and still function properly and cause the "spoiler effect" mentioned previously.
When tested on a BMW M3, the fake carbon vents were proven to detract the body and caused the fenders to bend in succession with the turning radius via the "carbon-corioalus" effect, which is the idea that if you fired a carbon fiber bullet from a gun, the shell would hit the ground the same time the bullet did after it traveled a significant distance. The principle is applied to the M3 and was altered by placing "air-altering side-wings" on the fake carbon fiber vents, as shown in this example:
It is theorized that the vents were supposed to allow the M3 to travel at a faster rate backwards since it was adhered with 3M tape, this was not true however and the increase of speed in the reverse gear was only minimal.
When the same principle was used on the Escalade, however, the "air-altering side-wings" did not create the same effect and caused too much body roll and drag, and had to be recessed. Also the 3m tape did not cause the same effect on the Escalade as it did the M3. The carbon fiber "inlay" did however cause the necessary catalytic effect and form the "mini spoilers" mentioned previous. The side vents were still placed on the Escalade, though the performance increase was minimal.
The fake carbon fiber is not just any fake carbo fiber either, it is a polytheistic- major- cadence, in other words, a material that believes in multiple gods and can keep pace surprisingly well, it is thought that the material's belief in many dieties causes it to form the mini-spoilers, which might be rooted in greek mythology though that is still left to research and discussion. Since 3M double-sided tape is not an incredibly old invention, the earliest forms of "fake" side vents were adhered using a mixture of cow dung and melted iron. The iron/dung mixture was thought a perfect form for mounting because it correctly bended the fenders to the correct form and allowed the car to basically morph around it, but thought too cost-in-efficient since the only person still able to mix cow dung and iron lived during the "Marry-Wanna" art erra and forgot how to form the mythical mixture during the recession shortly after.
The fake carbon fiber side vents are still a major scientific/religious argument today. Because of the science that works behind them, and also the fake fiber's belief in multiple dieties, it is basically an argument in itself. The vents are widely sold in auto parts stores and vary in price depending on performance, shiny-ness, and craftsmanship of the fake carbon fiber inlay.